2015 May 9 -A Love Expressed Part II

Thank you Mark for helping me make this overdue change to the blog.  The new title was suggested  teasingly by him and I  instantly liked it because it is an ongoing joke in our family- and was when Leland was still with us. He would like it, as my glasses are the subject of at least one treasure hunt every single day!

To be notified by e-mail when a new blog is posted, let me know, by email, by FB private message or a phone call. 

A Love Expressed Part II

  Leland graduated from Columbia Adventist Academy in June of 1965. I elected not  to return, partly for financial reasons, but mostly because I wanted the freedom to see my Sweetheart whenever it was possible for us to be together, as we lived 150 miles apart with our parents. I enrolled in night school, while working full time at United Medical Laboratories.  Leland worked with his Dad and brother in the woods, hoping to go to Walla Walla College and take electronics.  However, he was drafted in December of that same year, 1965, and left on the 8th of December.  He was drafted as a non-combatant and  trained as a medic for a Battalion Aid Station. When his basic and AIT (Advanced Individual Training) were over, he was stationed at Ft Irwin California with an Artillery Unit, training for Viet Nam. 

The exchange of folded notes for nearly two years at school, became a flood of letters, first from Redmond to Portland, then from Ft. Sam Houston, a couple from Ft. Lewis, and the rest from Ft Irwin, in the southern California dessert.  How I haunted the mailbox for a letter from him!  My hope was almost always rewarded; he was very faithful with his writing.  Those letters, recently removed from the box where they have resided for nearly 49 years, are very precious to me.  They were at the time they were written, for they spoke of hope, of love, of plans for our future, and of anticipation.  I treasured those letters, with their sometimes misspelled words, written on whatever paper he could find.  They told me the news, what he had done that day, but more importantly of his love for me.  I read them over and over, and answered quickly.  By the next day or so, another one would arrive, and I would pore over it, again and again.

In this age of cell phones, unlimited long distance and texting, a courtship carried on by snail mail is almost incomprehensible. But those technical advances were still many years in the future for us. The US mail was all we had; that and a very occasional long distance phone call that was definitely outside our slim budget. Stamps were 5 cents for regular mail, and 8 for airmail.  We opted for the extra 3 cents in order to get our mail one day sooner.

On a cold November night, 1965, before he was drafted,  Leland had come to see me in Portland.  We went out together that night, I don't remember where, but I do remember that we ended up on Mt. Tabor overlooking the city lights.  He parked the car, I slid into his arms and we exchanged a few lingering kisses. He then told me how much he loved me, and asked me to be his wife.  I said yes, he reached under the seat, took out a  little box and opened it to reveal a very pretty,  modern little watch ( the SDA alternative to an engagement ring). He  placed it on my right wrist and we were officially, engaged.  It was a delightful surprise, not the proposal, I was expecting that at some time, but the manner, the timing and the watch were all unexpected. That was his style, he loved surprises, and was very good at keeping his secret until time to reveal his plans. 

We had no money, he was to be drafted in December, and most likely sent to Viet Nam.  I was still in my senior year, going to night school and working during the day.  My wages were 1.65 per hour and  I was  helping my parents out by giving them one hundred dollars per month room and board.   We had no idea when we would be able to be married and support ourselves.  The only certainty we had was our love for each other and a determination to be together, whatever that would take.

 All of our wedding plans were carried out  through the US Mail, one letter at time. It was difficult to plan our wedding without a date. We were uncertain when  he could get a leave to come  home; the consequences of a probable pending deployment to Viet Nam, and not enough  money  were a constant concern.  But with all of those issues there was also  the sweet anticipation of knowing that when  the details were finally worked out, we would be married and together for the rest of our lives.

 We were married  July, 3, 1966 on a cool rainy day in Portland at the Village Church.  It was the best and happiest of days!

Now, after nearly 49 years of happy marriage to my best friend, lover, and father of our children, those letters and notes are doubly precious to me. The envelopes are  ragged on the edges, torn open by eager fingers, and yellowed with age.  They speak of  promises kept, dreams fulfilled, a love that matured and became more precious as the years went by, living now only in my memories, and in my heart. They spark memories of a life well lived, and  remind me that I am a fortunate woman to have been loved by a man such as he, faithful, loyal, true to his family and to his God.  Never were promises  of love more faithfully kept than by my Sweetheart.

The world would not judge these letters as great prose, but to me, outside of the Bible, they are the most precious words ever penned; I will treasure them in my heart for as long as I draw breath.

A Love Expressed

A Love Expressed

Love letters are a wonderful means of communication; when a couple is apart,  or perhaps is unable to speak the words one wishes to say, or just as a lovely surprise for the loved one.

I was the happy recipient of many such delightful letters in the 2 and a half years we went together before our marriage.  We were in a SDA Boarding school when we met; it was definitely against policy for us to spend much time together.  The time we were able to spend was strictly controlled and limited.  Of course, teenagers in a boarding school must be closely chaperoned. But mere rules will not suffice to keep two hearts apart which are  meant to be together.

Our first meeting was in the summer, at school.  I was there working to earn my entrance fee. It was lunch time, when into the cafeteria came Leland, his brother Norm and their Dad.  I was not sure who they were, but thought maybe they were Lamar VanTassel's brothers.  He had been my Pathfinder leader, and had told me about them.  They went through the boy's line and I went through the girls line.  We ended up at tables beside one another, and Leland pulled out my chair for me.  I had never been the recipient of such a courtesy before, and was impressed.  I said thank you, we smiled at each other and sat down to eat at our respective tables.  I sneaked several glances at him as we ate, and noticed he did the same to me, but no more words were exchanged that I can remember. 

Several weeks later, when school began, there he was again.  Our class schedules did not mesh, he being a junior, and I a sophomore, but we did see each other in cafeteria each day;  always caught each other's eye and smiled. 

A few days after school began, the traditional ASB (Associated Student Body) all school picnic,  was held at Lewisville Park.  We all milled around the central structure, which is still there.  I was sitting on a log talking with my roommate. Leland and his brother and some friends were hanging around the area, standing in front of us.  I could not help but notice him-which I am sure was his intent!  An event was announced on the field below us, and before I could even rise from the log, Leland stood in front of me, stepped gently on my toe, and said "let's go."  That was all it took; we spent that entire happy day together, not yet knowing it was only the first of thousands.  We talked so easily, of many things as we participated in the planned activities.  By the end of the day, when we loaded up on the buses, and went back to the dorms, I was very sure he was the nicest boy I had ever met.
  

Once a week was couples night, when rather than the usual assigned seating, we choose with whom we wished to sit.  Leland asked me to sit with him at the very next Couple's night, which may have been the first one of that school year, 1963/64. I, of course, said yes. We were immediately once again in tune with one another. There was never a lack of subjects to discuss in getting to know each other under the very watchful eye of the faculty members.

Two hearts destined for a lifetime together will find a way to communicate-even when frowned upon.  So began the notes to each other.  Who wrote the first one? Undoubtedly it was Leland, for most girls waited for the guy to make the first official move in those days. I was no exception to that rule, but I do remember making very sure that he knew I liked him!  It was entirely mutual, though, as he also gave me no doubt that he found me very attractive as well

Very soon in our relationship, one of the girls who was in his class came to me and told me to leave him alone. "He will break your heart," she said, "he has another girlfriend in California that he really cares for."  I thought about that, but decided I was here, and she was there, and I would just see what happened.  We must have talked about it at some point, because in one of the  notes he slipped to me very soon thereafter, he told me he had said his good-byes to Lavonne, because he was really liking my company very much. Thus began the relationship with the love of my life.  I was only 15, he 17, but the love we first expressed through those notes has lasted a lifetime.
 

The notes we exchanged while at school, were all on some sort of lined paper, usually torn out of a composition book, or a steno pad.  They were always folded in quarters vertically, then folded into a small square, with the edges tucked into a diagonal fold. They were quite compact that way, easy to carry in a pocket and slip into an eager hand, or ask a roommate to give to his brother/roomate,  who would then give it to him.  Those notes could not be  passed  openly,  for fear a faculty member would demand to see it.
 

There are those who might laugh or snicker at those notes, and at us for being so young and so serious about our relationship.  I would not advise it today, but it worked very well for us.  We wrote many notes to each other,  went to every couples night, and every mixed play period we were allowed to attend  together.  When Christmas time came, the school went Ingathering on weekend  evenings. Different church members deemed responsible, volunteered to take out small groups in their cars, for caroling and collecting money for disaster relief.  Was that an opportunity!  We of course went, and managed to sit side by side in the back seat.  It was dark, and it was there we exchanged our first kiss.  I don't remember much more about that caroling season, nor who the driver was, nor with whom or what we sang, but I do remember those delicious kisses!

The notes continued through that year, and the next, our last year there. We were enabled to communicate thoughts and feelings, dreams and desires through those notes that we would have been unable to otherwise.  One day a few weeks before his graduation,  we risked a few moments to talk  after class right in front of the AD building.  I remember he told me he was nearly to the first of two major goals.  I asked what they were, and his reply was "to graduate from here, and marry you!"

To be continued....